Oh, Steve Madden

Really, you shouldn't have. Like, you REALLY REALLY should not have:

($149, Steve Madden)

($99.95, Steve Madden)

The real ones were bad enough -- and JUST about to finally die! These are a comedic collage of faux-Balenciaga errors.

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Promo Code: 20% Active Endeavors

Get 20% off everything at ActiveEndeavors.com
Promo Code: SPRING20
Expires: March 23rd, so git on it.

And girl, you KNOW I just bought those 80%20 blue loafers I blogged about earlier this week:

Originally $48, but they came to $38 with the discount.

Oh, AND ActiveEndeavors does free UPS shipping! YAY!

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A Few Fun, Affordable Spring Picks

For a minute there, I was like, maybe that post title could be a palindrome. Then I was like... fuck it. It's late. So here are the cute and affordable items, in descending order of cost:

(Apprx $132 USD, Topshop.com)

From the new Kate Moss Topshop collection. Now, honestly, I wasn't blown away by her initial offering. But I love this. I'd love it even more if it didn't have the little ruffle at the waist, but we know ruffles are quite in. Even if they're definitely not universally flattering. Still, I love the embroidered detail and the simple colors.

($48, 80%20, ActiveEndeavors.com)

I wouldn't wear all of 80%20 designer Ce Ce Chin's shoes, but I love the ideas and inspiration behind them. And I am totes enamored of these robin's egg blue punk loafers -- also available in "grape" (hee!) and green.

($39.50, Delias)

Boy shorts aren't always the MOST flattering, but I love the classic tie-neck '40s/'50s look here.

($29.50, Old Navy)

Two cute new suits from Old Navy. They both hit stores April 1. The golden metallic one is a BIT American Apparel (in the bad way), except that it isn't cut below one's crotch. It also HAS a crotch, so that's good. Anyway, metallic definitely has its place on the beach (though it may be its only place I think it's okay in non-accessories form), so I endorse this suit, but the brown one is even better.

($10, Malina, ManicTrout.com)

Never mind that the site's name sounds like a tedious jam band (which is redundant.) These vintage lucite earrings are really sweet, and they're actually tiny -- just a quarter-inch. Tee!

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High Rollin' On Hump Day (Translation: Expensive Stuff)

All of the following items have the following in common:

1.) They're gorgeous.
2.) I want them all.
3a.) They're all $169 and up.
3b.) In my world, things $169 and up qualify as "expensive."

Let's take a looksee, shall we? In declining order of dearness, meaning the closer you get to the bottom, the greater your chances become of being able to afford stuff (if you're me).

($895, Anya Hindmarch, Vivre.com)

DEFINITELY not a plastic bag.

($390, Celestina, Vivre.com)

Beautiful, timeless, worth doing some "creative refinancing" on the monthly budget for... almost maybe.

($385, Jill Stuart, Shopbop.com)

So sweet, and more subdued than your typical red-and-black cherries fare.

($365, MZ Wallace)

Gorgeous everyday bag. Love it in orange too.

($363, Alexis, ActiveEndeavors.com)

And you, faux croc ombre envelope clutch -- I covet you most of all.

($216, Maria Bonita Extra, ActiveEndeavors.com)
Possibly the greatest ballet flats/ skimmers/ whatever ever.

($169, Prairie New York, CoutureCandy.com)

I'm starting to feel a bit "meh" bout jeweled embellishments at this point (but not 100%), though this is supes cutes. But don't click the "indigo" version if you're easily offended!

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Old Navy's Safari Style

Dear Todd Oldham,

I know we don't know each other personally, but I used to like watching you on House of Style back in the day on MTV. I'm sorry that neither your clothing line nor, let's be honest, that Bravo show you hosted worked out. But I'm over the moon over the news that as of October 2007, you've been named the new creative director of struggling Old Navy.

Old Navy's always been there for me, but only sorta in that last resort sorta way. In much the same way that you'll eat the last, sorta crappiest looking thing in your pantry -- the thing you wouldn't touch but only turn to out of starving desperation -- Old Navy is usually last on the list.

But I have hopes that much as you were able to resurrect shitty old college couches by recovering them with animal prints, you'll be able to breathe life back into Old Navy, which, it seems, is now "The O.N."

And, seeing as how I have a weird giraffe-print fetish, I'm hugely enamored of your new urban explorer line of safari-inspired stuff:

So much cute animal-print stuff, and so easy to shop for! And I truly love the citrusy yellows and greens. Lovely change from Old Navy's usual crop of primaries and pastels.

More stuff I'd readily buy:

($29.50, Old Navy)

While there's been much ado about this dress, I'm a much bigger fan of this one. Nice way to do florals and safari without doing too much of either.

($19.50, Old Navy)

Speaking of ado, there's been plenty of it over the giraffe-print clutch, but I'm also fond of the squiggly olive-print clutch too.

($15, Old Navy)

Sweet, simple little keyhole top -- a classier alternative to a tank or Tee.

($19.50, Old Navy)

I do believe I need both of these animal-print and animal-print-inspired (because I'm not sure what animal is red and grey, but I'd sure like to meet him!) flats. (MKHo blogged about the lemony ones not too long ago. Psychic style sisters!)

($4, Old Navy)

We all need undies! I have a pair of similar hipster unders, and they fit perfectly and have held up after many a'wash. (Because I'm hygienic like that!) And these are waaaay cheaper than the awesome yet expensive Cosabella bottoms I blogged about befo'.

Okay, well, Todd, I realize that this has become more of a personal shopping list than a letter. I'm off the ballet (yay!), so I'll end this now with this old-school House of Style clip.

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Natalie Portman For Te Casan

Tonight I stopped by the Te Casan launch party for Natalie Portman's collection of vegan shoes. I'd never been to the designer Soho shoe boutique, but I'd always wanted to go. Loved the mod decor... and the mini toasted grilled cheese.

Photos (all by Fashionbinge) thusly:





As anyone with functioning eyeballs can tell, she was stunning. She was also quite petite but definitely not el grosso-looking. Anyway, she had on a pair of her own (duh) "Pippa" Mary Jane heels in red (each style starts with "P"). As much as I liked the faux patent leather Poppy heels (shown above in red), they're pretty freaking basic for $225. That extra scratch has got to fund the celebrity machine.

Now, don't get me wrong, I can barely draw a cartoon shoe let alone create actual designer shoes (though I'm not sure how deeply she was involved in the technical areas of shoe making), but most of the shoes were a bit of a snooze. Nice and elegant (ostensibly like Natalie herself), but nothing to write home about... or pay two Benjamins for.

Now what I WOULD pay a few hunnies for were shoes by some of the other guest designers:

Fay Baldock

Zoe Lee: Can you tell she designed for Vivienne Westwood?



Gianluca Soldi: Love the top pair.

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Vince Camuto's O'Shea Shoe: Perfect Valentine's Heel!

Eee! A late edition to today's Valentine's shoe-related post:

($119.95, Vince Camuto, Nordstrom)

Okay, these "O'Shea" pumps look a l'il wack from the front, but check out the side view:

Perfecto for the current architectural shoe trend, no? And I'll be honest, while the pink ones are fun -- I wouldn't wear them prolly, but if I saw a girl walkin' down the street in them, I'd clap for that shit -- I really want the yellow ones to be my Valentine:
Actually, I think I want Vince Camuto to be my Valentine! Every time I pause to admire shoes in a store window or online, they end up being Vince Camuto. (I sort of think of them as more upscale Steve Madden). And Vince, if you're reading this: I'm a size 8. Call me.

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Happy Hooker Heels For Valentine's Day

I know they've got a touch of the hook to them, but Valentine's Day, like Halloween = embrace your inner tramp. Accordingly, these candy-pink heels are fun. And hi, they're only $26. Plus, Lulu's has a 15% off coupon code, y'awl: VDAY.

($26.50, Lulu's)

Parfait con...

($9, Bourjois, Sephora)

And speaking of polish(ed):

($52, Pink, Lulu's)

A lovely alternative to "FM" hooker heels, for those of you more Rive Gauche than Paris Hilton.

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More Proof Docs May Be On The Rebound (Unfortunately)

GAH! Trend Central is starting to get behind the impending return of Doc Martens! Ugh. If these Palladiums (soooooooo '90s!) are any harbinger, I guess I'd rather go with Docs. Though barely.

($120, Doc Martens, Zappos)

Whatsnextblog.com tracked down these pink lacy lace-ups yet erroneously referred to them at gotta-have-ems. They make me wanna gouge my eyes out. Unless I see them on Hayley from Paramore -- I'm sorry, but she's adorable.


More Doc stuff:
+ Free People pats itself on the back via its blog (!?!?!?!?) for carrying them. Zzz.
+ Docs fired Saatchi + Saatchi London for its some-might-say-tasteless ads depicting dead rockers in Docs. (Um, teeee!)
+ The New York Times already called it a month. Me = late to the party, clearly, but not buying it. I'm still barely able to wrap my head around the rebirth of Keds.

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What Would You Do... For These Chie Mahara Heels?

($350, Chie Mahara, ShoeMine.com)

Dudes, remember those insipid "What would you do for a Klondike bar" commercials, where some cheesy ad execs thought everyday people would be so desperate for a poorly designed wedge (how do you eat a SQUARE of ice cream with NO spoon, no stick, no handle, nothing!) of tasteless vanilla ice cream covered in barely edible cheap chocolate that they'd bark like a dog (a big dog!), hop up and down on one foot, or do something REALLY crazy like put the dirty dishes in the sink!

Well, I wouldn't do any of that bullshit for a crappy, inexplicably Inuit-inspired cheap-ass bodega frozen dessert, but for these Chie Mahara "Ox" heels (they're cheaper on the Chie Mahara site, but some of the sizes are sold out), I'd... punch an old lady, smack a baby (but only if it was crying), leave a banana peel in someone's path, not warn someone that they were about to sit on a bench full of wet paint, rob a T-Mobile, or possibly even kill a grifter.

What would YOU do for Chie Mahara?

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Victoria's Secret Booties: Love 'Em Or Leave 'Em?

I swear, I'm not even making drug party, but I think I actually like these booties by Victoria's Secret.

($39, Victoria's Secret)

I know. They're Victoria's Secret! And they're metallic! Normally that'd be a double ew, but am I wrong in thinking that the silver ones would be cute with a pair of dark indigo skinny jeans and a little black jacket? Really wrong? Lemme knows, hos!

Two far less controversial boots:

($268, Frye, Urban Outfitters)


($79, Urban Outfitters)

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Tweety Shoes: For the Birds

... And for infantile adults who don't know how to dress, too!

Via ThreadTrend, whose writer, Manuel Paul, shares my burning haaaaatred for any apparel with Betty Boop on it. Manny, I'll see your Betty Boop and Tweety, of course, and raise you any other item of non-child-sized clothing with a fucking Looney Tune, Pooh bear, Sesame Street or franchised cartoon character. It's horrifying, humiliating and repellent. And these shoes are no exception. This is some serious Lil Mama shit right here, and I mean that in the worst way possible.

I guess the only way you could get away with wearing these would be if you wore them shiny leggings, a vinyl fanny pack, and a doggie bag. And then punched yourself in the brain.

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